TPC-Journal-V1-Issue3

164 The Professional Counselor \ Volume 1, Issue 1 acknowledgement of same-gender oriented thoughts and feelings while accepting being LGB as a positive stage of being (Browning, Reynolds, & Dworkin, 1991; Kus, 1990; McGregor et al., 2001; Ridge, Plummer, & Peasley, 2006). The process of forming an LGB identity or “coming out” is a challenging process as it involves adopting a non-traditional sexual identity, restructuring one’s self-concept, and changing one’s relationship with society (Reynolds & Hanjorgiris, 2000; Ridge, Plummer, & Peasley, 2006). Coming out for bisexual individuals is a “more ambiguous status” (Hunter, 2007, p. 53) as it is complicated by marginalization from both the straight and gay communities. This marginalization usually includes same-gender oriented friends urging bisexual individuals to adopt a gay lifestyle and heterosexually-oriented friends pressuring them to conform to heterosexual standards (Smiley, 1997). Although it is common for research on bisexual individuals to be lumped with lesbians and gay men (Hoang, Holloway, & Mendoza, 2011), Knous (2005) proposed a series of steps that individuals who identify as bisexual might take in disclosing and ultimately embracing their sexual identity. The first step is to be attracted or to participate in sexual activity with someone of either gender. The second step is to become labeled as bisexual either by themselves or by society. The third step is to be participatory in the bisexual community through personal or group pride. Bisexual individuals still experience stigma similar to their lesbian, gay, or heterosexual counterparts (Knous, 2005), and respond in similar ways: they might “pass” as either gay or straight, an act intended to hide one’s same-gender attractions (Herek, 1996); disclose their bisexual identity; or join support groups to fight the stigma (Knous, 2005). Multiple researchers have described average chronological ages at which experiences related to coming out occur, which were summarized by Hunter (2007). Lesbians and bisexual women first experience awareness of same-gender attraction between the ages of ten and eleven years; gay and bisexual males between the ages of nine and thirteen years. Gay male youths on average experience their first sexual experiences a few years later between the ages of thirteen and sixteen years, while lesbian youths experiment around twenty years of age. First disclosures of sexual orientation happen between the ages of sixteen and nineteen for lesbian youths, and sixteen and twenty for gay male youths. Regardless of the age of disclosure, negative responses to being lesbian, gay, or bisexual still occur, and this “tempers the motivation of persons…in terms of making disclosures” (Hunter, 2007, p. 84). This may explain the three main patterns of sexual identity in individuals who are moving towards identifying as gay, lesbian, or bisexual (Rosario, Schrimshaw, Hunter, & Braun, 2006). These patterns include consistently identifying as gay or lesbian, transitioning from bisexual to gay or lesbian, and consistently identifying as bisexual. Youths who were engaged in transitional identities continued to change their behavior and orientation to match their new identity. The process of acceptance of one’s sexual identity, committing to that identity, and integrating that identity into one’s life is something that does not end after adolescence, but continues into adulthood (Rosario, Schrimshaw, Hunter, & Braun, 2006). The process of coming out could be a major source of stress for LGB individuals (Iwasaki & Ristock, 2007). Some disclosures could cause harm in the lives of LGB individuals such as family crisis, dismissal from the household, loss of custody of children, loss of friends, or mistreatment in the workplace (Hunter, 2007; Rotheram-Borus & Langabeer, 2001; Savin-Williams & Ream, 2003). Yet, not coming out to others means LGB individuals must maintain personal, emotional, and social distance from those to whom they remain closeted in order to “protect the secrecy” of their “core identity” (Brown, 1988, p. 67). A number of studies have explored the unique challenges associated with the coming out process for LGB individuals. A study by Flowers and Buston (2001) investigated “passing” as heterosexual, or assuming the identity of a heterosexual individual while hiding behaviors associated with an LGBT identity. In their study, Flowers and Buston examined the retrospective accounts of gay identity development for 20 gay men. Living a lie was identified as a common theme in their interviews such that many men continued to assume a heterosexual identity as a response to a non-accepting homophobic society. This lie was not something that was simply stated; rather, it had to be created and maintained “all the time” (p. 58, Flowers & Buston), and only temporarily eased the participants’ feelings of isolation and identity confusion (Flowers & Buston). Shapiro, Rios, & Stewart (2010) support the findings of Flowers and Buston. In this study that explored narrative accounts of sexual minority identity development among lesbians, cultural norms that failed to acknowledge the existence of non-normative sexual identities were identified and discussed. Such neglect of LGB identities required personal silence on the part of the respondents, which helped them avoid the negative consequences of coming out such as feelings of danger and discomfort as well as punishment.