The Professional Counselor | Volume 13, Issue 4 457 Adaptation Possibilities If a person does not use tobacco as part of the letting-go ceremony, other elements of nature can be used instead. For example, a person can use a stone. A stone/rock is known as a “grandfather” in many Indigenous cultures. They have been on the earth the longest and have helped humans for many generations, carrying wisdom and strength. As a symbol of letting go, a person could find and hold a grandfather (rock) in their hand, releasing their pain from the human experience back into the earth through the rock, symbolizing that we do not have to carry the pain within us, but that we can release it to Mother Nature, who serves as a caregiver to us all. Letting-Go Ceremony: A Case Example Lisa, a non-Indigenous client, came to counseling to address the trauma of losing an unborn child. During the sessions, the counselor and Lisa explored the impact of this trauma. Together, they decided to engage in a letting-go ceremony as a means for healing. As a first step, the counselor gave credit to the origins of the letting-go ceremony and explained to the client how and from whom the intervention was learned. In preparation for the ceremony, the counselor obtained the necessary items, while also tending to their own emotions to ensure that the ceremony was delivered in a healthy and therapeutic way. The counselor prepared the meeting space to ensure that it was free of distractions. A blanket was laid on the floor with a sacred altar or centerpiece, on which both the counselor and Lisa placed items that were meaningful to them. Elements of the natural world were also part of the altar—examples of potential elements include a stone, tree leaves, a small dish of water, and even an electric candle to represent fire. In addition, objects that represented other important people in the client’s life could be present, such as a small picture or an item that belongs to a significant person. That object signifies that one does not carry the challenges in their lives alone, that there are other humans who helped to guide one along the way. In this case, the centerpiece objects were selected collaboratively by the counselor and Lisa with the intention of providing support during the letting-go ceremony. Next, the counselor offered a small piece of cloth (4” by 4” square) to Lisa, while keeping a piece of the material for themself. In this cloth, Lisa and the counselor placed dried herbs and natural earth medicines brought specifically for the ceremony. They then tied their individual bundles of herbs with a small string and held them in their left hands, which are closest to the human heart. Importantly, only a small amount of dried medicine (one teaspoon) was used for the cloth tie. Next, a song was played. (Other options include reading a poem or offering several moments of silence.) The counselor explained to Lisa that the particular moment was spent intentionally in sending any energy from the traumatic experience into the tied cloth. After some time passed and the client signaled that they felt ready, the counselor brought the session to a close. The altar was disassembled while both participants continued to hold their ties. At the end of the session, the counselor explained that the cloth tie that held the medicine and the energy from the ceremony can be placed on the earth, left at the base of a tree, placed in the woods, or even put near a body of water. The implication and healing properties of the ceremony were that the energy and emotions from the loss are now part of the tie and part of the earth, so that Lisa did not have to carry them all individually. The counselor also explained that a letting-go ceremony was not a onetime practice, and that throughout Lisa’s life, she now had the knowledge to practice letting go as needed.
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